Monday, August 12, 2013

Daily Agitations -- the place where choices resolve into certainties--every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority huxley--lay sermons

The sky's gray today--nothing unusual about that but sort of makes me feel full of memories--dogs have stopped eating--i keep their bowls clean after finding slug crawling all over them and even in them--but they still aren't eating the way they should--one of the dogs have found our new neighbors--they have chickens not like in chicken houses--but in pens on the ground--my boxer--can't stay away the excitement of trying to dig the birds out of the cages is to great--I'm sure the neighbor doesn't like it--he's trying to get a coop fixed up but I'm afraid Sammy the boxer--will eventually kill all the chickens--if he doesn't hurry--she so persistent--maybe he want shoot or hurt her--really be sad if he did--I was sitting out in front of the garage yesterday she came slinking up the drive with a chicken in her mouth--I have a feeling that's where she is now--but there's nothing I can do--except sit here and wonder--the chickens are special--don't know his plans--about them-- who knows he may be raising them as fighters but that is just a guess--he's got them in separate cages--plastic--Janet mu daughter took the kids with her today--she's got to go to the clinic and she's got them a dentist appointment--and then she's taken them to the outlet mall or wherever to buy school clothes--school starts the ninth of August--it's the first of August now--I got tomatoes coming on but they haven't been watered in some time--so I watered them good yesterday--if I'm going to have some greens before winter--I've got to get them in the ground soon--got back into Westerns or cowboy books--She Came to the Valley--Cleo Dawson--I'm reading now--don't know why I picked it up--but not disappointed--I was thinking about women in general and noticed I had this book and just started reading it--you can't compromise with spirit...

Winter Solstice
Dec. 21 (shortest day--longest night)
March 21st (Vernal or spring equinox) Day and night equal

Summer Solstice
June 21 (longest day of the year)
Fall equinox (Sept. 23 Equal day and night)

Spring equinox  (falls between Pisces and Aries)
Summer solstice (falls between Gemini and Cancer)
Fall equinox (falls between Virgo and Libra)
Winter Solstice (falls between Sagittarius and Capricorn)  

Went and bought some grapes--the packages was sealed really good--when I got home the grapes in the sealed package were horrible--you know how you feel a grape and right under the skin--it's sort of firm--well these were mushy--soft beyond good eating and the taste--was sort of winery--well it sounds like I'm a big whiney type person--but where I live you've got to remember I live way out in the country--like it takes me 30 minutes just to get to a store--if I'm in a hurry--made me sort of mad--but where I live you get the kind of attitude--what did you expect--they came from the big Wal-Mart--when I went back--I watched the guy--who took care of these fruits and I asked him what he did with bad fruit--he checked it and then if it was still good he re-packaged it--nice after I left and was walking around the store--I got to thinking--was he joking...

I falling apart at the seams--the greens have settled down they went from early mixed greens colors--to almost greens of the same color--to total green--unless you live in the woods--you don't notice that greens are of many shades--the shadows are deeper now the leaves have all filled in their spaces and the Sun barely gets through--truth has gone by the wayside--each truth should be a goal--to attain--yet we taken the road always traveled--one with less trails and tribulations--because we don't have to face ourselves when we live in lies--we can just say what we want--let it go--and move deeper in debt--and care less if we have to face up to what we do--each truth we reach should be another step upward--and a goal to aspire to--reach one find another truth--we can approach--

A man usually falls in love with a woman who asks the kind of questions he is able to answer…Ronald Coleman

Book: If Chins Could kill--:Confession of a B Movie Actor--Bruce Campbell--Campbell reveals what it feels like to be a star in certain circles and a nobody in others…another of my books I like because it's so revealing in human terms--(He starred in T.V. series Xena and Hercules--and two cult movies Evil Dead-- and Army of Darkness--movies pretty gory but hey isn't that what parents let children see..

Easter--again I take another gander--into the way I'm living--compared with all the other Easter's I lived through--it was nothing-- a day--another day--not trying to make it boring sounding but hey when you get older things have changed--thoughts wonder in and out--I've actually been trying to figure out how many days it's been since I left home you know went out in the world--I honestly can't remember the last day I went somewhere other than just outside the back door--I was going back through all my old pictures--cats, dogs, people, shots of all kinds, memories--good gosh--almighty--the way things must have been back then--the way things have turned out--I almost want to get a beer--and it's only 7:21 in the morning--I buy a six pack and I don't exactly forget it's in there but usually I don't do anything with them until I feel like I'm wandering around lost and need to sit down and think--and I grab one --it use to be they stay in the refrigerator for weeks but not lately-I been going for broke and drinking more than usual--like maybe two or three a night--discovering things from the past is not unpleasant but it is thought provoking...

Be wiser than other people if you can, but do not tell them so…Philip Dormer Stanhope

For in a cold war words count at least as much as deeds...

The aftermath of war can be more dangerous than the war itself…

We humans act short sightedly--we do that which helps immediate situations, often to disastrous effects for future generations…

One would find life so much more enjoyable if one basked in joys without fearing for the future ones…

For there are,indeed, consequences to every choice we make, to everything we do or choose not to do…

Freedom allows each the right to choose the life before him or her, but freedom demands that the person accept the responsibility for those choices, good or bad…

You can give your heart to whomever you want, but you give your life to the one who's best for you and for the ones you love…

You're quite an expert in vagueness have you considered a career in politics…

Political platitudes satisfy for a short time only---people…but sooner or later we must realize we are being fed form without substance---What we must hear from our politicians is the truth,and we and they must believe it and we must hold them accountable…

There are always more questions than answers…

When you start looking for trouble--it starts looking for you…

We each give and we each take--and what we do should be the result of cooperation, not dictation…

The moment became so important silence made it golden, my eyes closed and watered, I felt uplifted, and remembered the first time that it had happened a long time ago…

I know,of course, what most tax payers still have a hard time understanding, Government cannot devise ways and means for giving back more than they can take in….

As the new masses come into our country--the appeal of America does not lie in truth…but in the vague impression it conveys to them that they and all Americans are partners in some tremendous, un precedented undertaking--the building of a proud future that will surpass and put all their troubles behind them and their kids a bright future...

We cannot win the weak by sharing our wealth with them…they feel our generosity as oppression…

What other people do should set no standards for us…therein lies one of the hardest of all lessons to learn…"For ye …like sheep" was no chance expression… Salvation itself lies in being different…But how am I to take thought and be different, without being different for the mere sake of difference??? I've seen a way…I shall turn to saying everything in a truthful way--I shall find this truth just where -I find everything else that is truthful for myself--in my own mind--if I will only look there, look steadily, and be willing to see--seeking-- I know what I will find…truth shall set me free...

What's happening --Untraceable neurochemicals instead of crude vegetable extracts---

Remember--Market researchers hunger for precise data on individuals --so do fund raisers, specialized address lists, journalists wanting subscription lists, computer dating services, memory is cheap and answers are so naïve--databanks are huge--credit companies, Insurance companies--Since electronic funds transfer money is another form of data---

He was peeking into the real window of life--To be good in anything a man has to love it and concentrate on it--put your heart where your thoughts are---

The sky at night --any view you can get --look -- that all it costs

Go--out in the woods--look up at the sky--thru branches, limbs, leaves, even wintered--the silhouettes ----

Frustrated anticipation like not getting something when it was expected--anticipation , or purpose, is more efficient than imagination in bringing about suitable responses; and this after all is the vital point in mental life---

it's an interesting scene to the cold world of barren reason----


It is all a question of comparative emphasis on what you regard as  " valuable ."--moral responsibility has been thrown out with the wash--the evil witch craft of the cry "raise the standard of living " peace and confidence and belief in the restorative powers of nature are still around--




Corky' s   Pond--men resort to talking only when they haven't the power to enforce their convictions upon others---can we be looked back on as rational animals--the tongue is, historically speaking, as old as the fist or the strongest arm....I am such a humanist that anyone approaching saint hood doesn't interest me----a plan that is sure to be carried out down to it's last detail already loses interest for me--



Today we still speak of " feeling " the truth , rather than  " thinking " it... human fallibility is the very essence to the color in our lives--

These are matters of habit which are all superficial-- " The universe is a lodging house for the myriad things and time itself is a  traveling guest of the centuries.
This floating life is like a dream. How often can one enjoy oneself?..." Li Po 


 There is no such thing as a human being so limited in intelligence, so dulled with routine, that he can't find interests which will make him alive to the tips of his fingers, to the ends of his hair--No more frayed nerves; no more nerves pounding at the end of your words...

But just let one idea come into your mind that sees to be leading you somewhere and away you go --energy--passion----d-e-s-i-r-e--reasons--actions--emotion--which comes first the chicken or the egg--

                  To feel an emotion--you will act--
                    in acting you feel an emotion.......

We are understanding more and more about less and less--"Mo-dern Specialization"

peace --I look beyond what we have here if that's possible--I believe one day we will be in a much better place--complaining no such luck-- I just want us headed in another direction--I have no credentials to say do this do that, it just has to be--our ways are rushing us towards extinction --it hurts to know --what's ahead--starlight nights--winter nights beside the fireplace--keeping the hearth warm --all is well in Ganttville --time in it's separated moments reveals--what spaces--leisure spaces--no one knows what they want to do with leisure time--mental, physical--no effort --hiding behind other reasons-- not facing what's in front of you--mental vacuity, trivial pleasures, and dissipation... the mind does not like having the  " vacuums "  ..

Our Life is shaped within us by our own desires and decisions--our own struggles and sacrifices....

  You get out of life just what--and no more than---you put into it...Your life will be as big or as cramped, as proud or as shabby, as successful or as futile as you yourself make it...
   Life is a one man job, and no one on earth can do that job for you---or should be expected to...Others may smooth the path a bit---lighten your load and brighten your way with love---but even such help is of dubious value, since it may tempt you to lie down and whine...
   Life is what you make it...And if you won't get busy on the making, you're just out of luck...

Paranoia isn't paranoia if someone is really after you...

The ashes of the average cremated person weighs nine pounds...

Ingratiation is the last resort of desperate people...

All people create a personal spore...

Only weak people take pleasure in imposing on the vulnerability of others and causing them pain...

He told himself crossly that a person could be too unselfish, so unselfish that he made everyone else feel guilty...

Why should I be blown about by every wind? Had I no firmness left in me...

I never told my wife I loved her enough or showed her---enough for me that is...

A list for my helper:
1.) Wood beside garage--(make into kindling)
2.) Plant rest of liriope
3.) Spray Akebia
4.) Garden (Till)
5.) Bring all boxes of books from upstairs
6.) Book shelves build in (Porch and pool room)
7.) Basement insulation
8.) Check room above Poolroom-what's up there and bring down

Friend of spiders:
Spiders the majority of which are harmless, are helpers of mankind in every sense of the word, destroying large numbers of other insects many of which are harmful...

They seemed intent upon living this lurid life, the ordinary evening wasn't enough---

I think a women gets more happiness out of being gay, light-hearted, unconventional, mistress of her own fate, than out of a career that calls for hard work, intellectual pessimism and loneliness...Zelda Sayre Fitzgerald

Statistical law of great numbers
If the number of tests of an event is large, then the proportion of successes in the tests is close to the likelihood of the event to manifest itself...

People never really mean to be unkind to children, or to each other, it is because they do not realize how suffering has degrees of intensity.. 

Writer Francis Thompson

A sweet bubbling cry from a birds throat fell down the wind, and pain stirred in my heart...

Kate Braverman 's--books
1.) The Incantation of Frida
2.) Wonder of the West
3.) Squandering the Blue
4.) Frantic transmissions to and From Los Angeles
5.) Lithium for Media
6.) Palm Latitudes

Marriage drains that which is unique in a women..

She had not the slightest notion that he made a point of observing the most intimate details of her life.. In fact he had found a hole in the wall between his room and hers; this served his curiosity and provided substance for his lecherous dreams...

A horny man will pretend an enthusiasm for just about anything...

No chemical compound has so many distinct and vital functions as water...in your body

Senescence is to a certain extent a matter of dehydration...

Fever is a defense reaction, generally against invading bacteria and viruses…

Raining here and the gray's are grayer--the greens set off it-- even looks cold between the trees a low fog covers the in be tween areas of branches and bowls of the tree…My son invited some people over to help him move some stuff his former wife wanted--they came , they arrived and then left--minimum of fuss--and bother--only some coffee--some one asked me the other day how I picked the pictures I choose--well it's what I guess you'd call ( the feel )--I'll be looking throughout the different drawings and one stops me and then I move slowly ahead looking at a few others--but keeping the one that stopped me in mind--I usually go back to that one at the beginning because it hung around more than others in my mind--My daughter came up wanting work to pay for something--I sort of quit asking what things are for--it's n--o--n--e  of my business…not the words but the looks--the scene is worth a thousands words--family drama --- Roxanne ---
  why I picked that shot of the pokeberries is just a feeling it comes as you go through things in life as one goes along-- these are the consequences from your movements through your life's path--there are times when I could have done things differently---it's hard looking backwards---most of the things you find back there are not what's ahead for you and it only matters if it leads you on--ward--conclusions have no place in an on going life--everything that happens goes on immediately--it's like first T.V. they couldn't change things they were live---real time scenes---as they were spoken----I can't believe I kept the forest so close to the house but it's worth it---the house setting in the middle like I built the house to fit in the woods and then let them grow up together--like playing a game called "Woods and House" living together ;  bought some loafers the other day and I don't think I remembered the part that the only people who wear loafers are those who have a lot of brainy work to do…cause they are specialty shoes they have a tendency to not let you do anything except something you can do in a totality relaxed frame of mind---Comfort--keeps bounding up when I get to thinking--and let my thinking go on it's own--it brings the word comfort--that's where all sensible minds ought to be headed in their thinking--today ---turn on your computer--check your e-mail--and don't catch "up" on the headlines--stay away--it's like to --drag your mind thru the horrors of the day--at the very first part of your day's beginning and it isn't worth--- what it will do for the rest of your day---they're becoming more devious in the ways they are attracting you--gimmicks-- so you don't let your fingers meander anymore--the least flicker--and you're somewhere you don't want to be--I heard that our president went on his vacation to Hawaii-- I can not imagine--but I can daydream--and it all comes up good….the holidays----one day after another--in line--pulling me from the bed so that I can get started on another wonderful (this word holds a lot) day--it's not so much what I do although it completes--the picture--and the way it all makes me feel---family points are the weakest structures in all relationships--they're built up out of soft plastic--so they can change shapes, contours, and fit in all the situations that occur in family interchanges--exchanges--and "goings on" the realms of which I sure can reach far beyond anything that can be…or not be…a truck just drove up the driveway---it looks like my truck--and so Jason and Greg are back from Cleveland--that was quick--almost like record time unless--well it's another one of those things i could waste my time and try to figure out--but damn it ain't any of my business---sort of reminds me of Chevy Chase this guy does--

But self pity is a fools game--It had been a strange site one unique in my experience--the thought kept coming back in,out, of a whole stuck of less acceptable thoughts--I have always wanted thought to be easy---to get what was needed--to alleviate what ever problems(if the right word) I would have to face---death always weighs out heavier than life--do ways always present themselves--the entire scene had the weird fatality of something that had happened and I knew I wanted no part of it---and never really had---except somehow I ended up here --Do feelings become weary---my thoughts are like airplanes whirling in jockeying for permission to land-- 

Feed back is a method of controlling a system by reinserting into it the results of its past performance…

Regularities are not absolutes but are rather statistical preferences which appear most of the time..

Panne is the  name ecologists give to an area from which the sand has been blown out right down to the 
saturated sand of the water table… this wet sand does not go away---it is one of the stabilizing factors of the dunes for vegetation…

She was always trying to find happiness instead of creating it--Jason Gantt

Tight roped along the edge of truth

Perception-- enlightenment--knowledge--Change--evolution…

I treated her like a little kid who wouldn't understand anything even if I explained it…

This all got started because none of us can look past what we're expecting…

I've never been one to hope for the best when the worst is staring me in the face…

I said you can have good will towards every body but you cannot choose who, or how you love…

Havana 1956--
It seems to me that the more expensive something is, the less of it there always seems to be….

"Lies" usually come gift wrapped in a thin tissue of truth…

Worth and value, they're not the same thing are they ? ….

You only think of the clever comeback after the argument's finished…

Isla Dewar's novel….

Politicians are nothing if not gossips…I think it's down to a lack of self-confidence,bad-mouthing  everyone else is such a simple option…

There are probably more eccentric rich people out there than normal ones...


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